nnrh.

[purapea]

Wow. No updates from me in two weeks. Thats unlike me. :/

So lately I've just felt like.. nothing matters anymore? I don't know, I just... I just don't care about anything. I feel like I'm sort of just floating about, with nothing to say or do. Just fading into darkness. lolnobodymuch Its really bizarre, but I'm sure it'll pass eventually. I think I've been stuck in this flat for too long. I'm going out later, to my friends birthday party. They have Singstar as well as some other awesome things planned, so it'll be good for me I think.

My plans for summer have to go on hold again. I was depending on Waitrose - the place where I used to work - to give me a job over Christmas. They initially said yes, but emailed me a few days ago to tell me that because of the new store opening in town they had to rethink their hours and they dont need me at all. So I am jobless over Christmas, which means no money for summer, which in turn means no Otakon. I am still looking for a job, I'm going to try at Game and stuff, but nrrrh. Its just so saddening that my summer plans are going down the toilet again. I'm going to need twice as much as I would've needed last year because of the shit economy. nnnnrrh. This keeps turning into a pipe dream that is never going to happen. I'm still going to try for it though.

Other than that, I had a blood test last thursday and have yet to get the results. I'm not worried, and I'm kind of hoping that there is something wrong with me. At least then they can put me on meds for it.

Right enough of my gloom. Whats up with my flist? c:

Comments

[warriorcereal.livejournal.com]

I HAS MONEY FOR YOU. :O

But I need your address again... could you send it to my e-mail? (dukesamcules@googlemail.com) or over DA~?

[purapea.livejournal.com]

oh shur bb. I'll give you my TRES COMPLICATED WELSH ONE CAUSE ITS FUN 8|a

[rivercoyote.livejournal.com]

Nuuuuuuuuuuuh. I want everyone to get together and get you over here. :c

[purapea.livejournal.com]

8( its not going to happen though Tanya. Its a lot more difficult to get me over than it is to get you over :x

[somnomania.livejournal.com]

Sounds like depression or something to me, bb, and I would know. I spend every day feeling like I'm surrounded by fog, and like I'm a shell of what I used to be. But yeah, maybe the blood test will have something. Might also be winter glumness.

Feel better, Pura. Besides, it could be worse. You could be Amy Winehouse. :Db

[purapea.livejournal.com]

The blood test came back absolutely fine. Theres nothing wrong with me in that area - which means my PCOS meds are working. I don't think its winter glumness, cause I LOVE winter! 8C
I don't know whats wrong with me, Kate. I really dont like it. I want help.


...lmfao. this is true.

[somnomania.livejournal.com]

You need to talk to a doctor or something. There are probably options for people who have no money; you'd just need to investigate a little, see what there is. Walk-in clinics or something, idk. And I know how you feel. :c It sucks, feeling like this. *snuggle*

*steals sad!Roxas and snuggles him too*

[purapea.livejournal.com]

Mnh. Theres a councilling clinic thats free to students, but I'm not sure. I'd feel weird going there, cause you know. I just sort of have bad days? Its nothing that can be fixed, its just my hormones being weird and me being down cause of it. I'd feel weird going to something like that and be expected to talk about stuff, thats totally stupid of me to be feeling. I dont know.

[somnomania.livejournal.com]

Go talk to someone. Make some notes beforehand; anything you can remember about patterns with when you feel bleh and when you don't, if anything seems to specifically trigger it or make it better, that sort of thing. When I got depressed, it was my decision to go to the doctor about it, because I was tired of feeling that way. And that's the thing about feeling that way; you have bad days, you have really bad days, and you have days that are sort of okay. But if you're tired of it, if you don't like feeling that way, and if it's keeping you from getting things done, you should do something about it. It might be something chemical, or it might be situational, because you're away at college, you're dealing with lots of work to do and not having enough money to even get food sometimes, and you miss your family, etc. That's pretty stressful. :\ Just go talk to someone about it, okay? I bet it'll help. <333333333